Either you love didn't love at all

"When you figure out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else...seem so small."

One of the thing that lessen the feeling that I am not alone is when I discover that someone that I don't even know is also yearning and longing to be with someone whom they should be over by the law of this world. What never cease to amaze me is the quick shift that someone you spend a lot of time with, loving, can quickly fall under the category of someone who becomes just a somebody in your everyday life. A somebody who may never be just somebody because you're not able to forget but becomes so anyways. There is a quote that I used to see that I used to be completely against in. Haha I am not sure why I've always thought opposite of what these quote said but I am starting to think that maybe they were right but I was just being a hipster about it. But the quote is "There is no "d" in love, it's either you love or didn't love at all" My automatic answer used to be that "yes! your love for someone can turn into "Loved" because when something does not work out, we have to move on because life moves on whether we like it or not"..I just thought that if someone didn't love me anymore why should I continue to do so because when the love is one side it seems that it falls under an unrequited love...and those are not fun at all. Ha! I thought I was mature then but I realized that although I am not that immature however I am just glad that I am still learning because life is constant realizations and constant learning.

How do you know where the balance is? In love and looking for it, I mean. I'm not talking about anyone specific here, so no need to start up the rumour mill. The scenario usually goes like this: First I backs off, then he back off. Then everything turns up side down. It's sort of a sad state of affairs really. And sometimes, I wonder if my past or our past makes it just a little harder to decipher the clues and cues. 
I don't want it to. I wish it didn't. But I can't help feeling like it does. At least sometimes.
Half the time, this leaves me having this conversation in my head:


Me: Don't you ever get tired of doing "the right thing?"
Me: Why, yes, Sophie, I do. I know exactly how you feel. 
Me: phewww.... I'm glad I'm not the only one. 
Me: Don't worry. you're not. Sometimes I feel like I'm always letting my (well, ours) mind dictate our actions and pushing our heart full of pumping emotions further and further down into our subconscious? (aihh...)

 I came to the conclusion that there could be a bit of truth in that quote because I live this quote almost every day. You see when you fell in love with someone but circumstances changes the situation, it doesn't mean that you automatically forget what made this person laugh, smiles or forget about their dreams.  It's like a memory from your childhood, it's no longer there but you remember great details about it, a moment you remember playing dress up, a moment where you were happy all the time, as time change the physical moment are gone but the memories have the tendency to stay. Sure the feeling of falling in love may fade away but I think it shifts from falling in love to simply love and care about the person.I am not going to pretend that the feeling doesn't fade away because even after the heart goes through a heartbreak, it has the power to go on and love again.


P/S: I have no words to say. I'm not going to fight, I'm not going to defend anything. Just one thing, THANK YOU for loving me, THANK YOU for caring.THANK YOU. =) I think we’ll be happy – ecstatic with our lives. I certainly hope we’ll be happy. Scars can become less prominent, patches can be removed, bruises can fade. We’ll heal
  
 ..just stay in love... teeheee... ^^

                                                             Heart's little bubble <3